Growing up I had two aspirations- Dying before I turned 18 or if God forbid that didn’t happen, making lots of babies. Don’t ask me the logic of my childhood goals, my view of the World was even more skewed and tainted, then. Anyway, in a few day I will turn all of 36 years old and would have miserably failed at achieving my goals. Ordinarily, each year a couple of weeks before or after the D-day triggers many melodramatic episodes but I seem unusually calm this year. I even feel a little celebratory, in fact. For the first time in my life I have gone without dating anyone, for this long. For anyone who takes that lightly let me enlighten you, here. People who spend an awful lot of time alone, usually have co dependent sometimes even obsessive relationships. They also have unrealistic expectations from these relationships and that leads to much disappointment. My theory is that though they may have a clear understanding of the functioning of the society, the coping mechanism is not in place. I have no scientific basis for this assumption, other than reading about studies on introverts or from various encounters with people such as myself.
Anyhow, don’t try to burst my bubble with your quizzical look, wondering how it’s even a big deal. It is to me. Do you want to hear what my new goals are? I want to live up to 100. I figured if I ain’t going to die young at least I should live long enough. It’s a great goal though, you should try setting it for yourself. Irrespective, of how old you may be, how terrible your life may have been, you will feel younger and more positive. Whatever, happens around me these days, I think to myself, ‘You have all the bloody time in the world, don’t fret!’ That’s why I am in no hurry to date anyone, new. Breathe in. Breathe out. Chiiill. Dil ko behlane ke liye Ghalib ye khayaal accha he.
But it would be such a pity to not date anyone at all. My other goal is to get myself to date myself. Solo dating. After my much publicized romance with my bed last year, I want to have a fabulous time, now. So, last evening I took myself out on my first date and first dates should be oh so special. Mine was-Fire walking with Tathagat Roy at Zorba the Buddha. But I don’t want to get into it at four in the morning. So later peeps.